Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Pronoia is the Antidote to Paranoia

My blog's been getting so depressing lately with all my focus on fighting the ills of the world it was a blessed relief to get an email newsletter from my favorite author/poet/astrologer Rob Brezsny. He's written a book called
Pronoia Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

It's a great book! Really funny, I need to read parts of it more often. Here's an excerpt in which he gets people to laugh at the absurdity of all the things in the world there seem to be to be afraid of:


Rank your favorite doomsday scenarios in order of preference.

____A new ice age

____Destruction of ozone layer

____Dramatic upsurge in earthquakes, volcanoes, and hurricanes

____Universal drug addiction

____Mass starvation

____Takeover by monsters created through genetic engineering

____Genocide of the imagination; lethal proliferation of dangerous images

____Terrifying, contagious superstitions spread by apocalyptic pop prophecy

____Insects and bacteria conspire to cull planet's most dangerous species

____Multinational corporate criminals create a single, globe-spanning totalitarian state with concentration camps that are the setting for popular reality TV shows

____Mutated flu strain becomes unstoppable plague

____Extraterrestrial invasion

____Cataclysmic degeneration of language into incomprehensible babble and cliché

____Anthrax and LSD dumped in water supplies

____Revolt of super-intelligent machines

____Stupidity becomes popular

____Mass hypnosis by evil political and religious leaders

____President, suffering from mental illness, goes berserk and nukes Mecca, Moscow, Beijing

____Virus from outer space

____Virus from inner space

____Essential natural resources run out

____Global addiction to porn results in accidental mass suicides through excessive masturbation

____Psychic terrorists administer mass brainwashing that causes millions to buy so many products they can't afford that they become destitute, can't afford health care, and die from diseases caused by eating junk food out of garbage cans

____The Internet births itself as a sentient global brain, but it's so riddled with spam that it becomes a god-like cripple suffering from the Artificial Intelligence version of Alzheimer's

____Earth is hit by comet, asteroid, or mini-black hole

____Wealthy philanthropists give everyone in the world $100,000, causing mass insanity

____Sun goes supernova

____Breakthroughs in disease control make it hard for people who are tired of living to die, leading to a pandemic of depression

____The devil possesses everyone in the world

____Nuclear war


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