Saturday, August 07, 2010

Calla Lily Flower Essence for Healing Issues Around Gender Identification

Those who are confused about their sexual identity or gender are in a great deal of pain. A young boy who feels trapped in a girl's body, a girl who feels like a man, never feels at home in their own bodies. People work with this in various ways; some choose a sex change. But even people who don't need to take such enormous measures to feel alright sometimes go through periods of distress around the gender they happen to be.

As a child and young woman I always was a man in my daydreams, fantasies and night dreams. I felt like a girl; I didn't feel like I was born in an inappropriate body. But the dreams I wanted for myself did not -- do not -- jibe with the dreams young girls of my generation were taught to expect for themselves. "Get a man, don't be one!" And "It's okay, Sheryl, you can be an artist or a writer or anything you want, just make sure you marry a nice man with enough money to support you!" But what if you don't wind up getting one of those wealthy millionaire types?

I was never a popular enough kid to expect my father's dreams of me marrying a rich guy who would take care of me might ever be reality. And today I have to struggle with the internalized messages I got in this weird backhanded way. "You can be ANYTHING you want / (just make sure you have a guy who can support you if you do)"


In my daydreams and often in night dreams as a girl and young woman I was always a man. Star pitcher for the Red Sox. The gold medal male Olympic athlete. A Star Trek hero, a cowboy hero. Always a hero and always a man. The song "I Need a Hero" comes to mind. Dad said I was going to need a man to play that role if I was going to be and do what I wanted most, so I must have internalized that if I was going to make it without a rich man to take care of me I was going to have to be the man for myself.

At a key point in my life I did a healing that resulted in my image of myself as a woman and my dreams of myself as a man merging. I never have dreams in which I'm a man anymore but I've never forgotten that the healing incorporated both male and female in my personality. It didn't throw one away.

That's what Calla Lily Flower Essence is for. It helps a person create a healthy and appropriate orientation to their gender by increasing one's spiritual awareness of our inherent connection to all genders. Our true identity embodies both male and female—it's only societal conditioning that attempts to limit the expression of all we can be. When we can embrace all of who we are and what we are capable of bringing into our lives regardless of gender our souls can relax and settle a lot more easily into the gender we happen to be.

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